So sad

wow... june....... where did the year go?

I am a bit down, just a bit. So many things to cherish in my life and this stupid money thing keeps bringing me down.

We are broke. Like, no money for groceries till next pay day broke. Like, credit card maxed out cant borrow money broke. Did we have to go broke now? Now that I wanted to spend a little?

After over a year behaving myself, after so long without going out and shopping for myself, I finally went on a shopping spree. The last two months I started doing the “I want it I’ll buy it thing”.

First for clothes because I lost a lot of weight and thought I needed new clothes. Then, I started to buy digisupplies, spent a little in April, then went overboard in May because of all the promotions, and I also had the “it is mother’s day” excuse. Then, last week, Alex bought me a external HD for $300…. maybe that was it. He mentioned if he knew I wouldn’t stop spending on digisupplies he wouldn’t have bought it. I think I didn’t but it myself because I knew I didn’t want to stop buying.

Well, it seems now I don’t have a choice, I just don’t have the money to spend. I got some money back from my health insurance today, and that is all the pocket money I have. I am worried now, what if something happens and we need money for the kids?

I can’t even say that staying at home with the kids made much difference. Childcare is so expensive that I would be totally working for free anyway, unless I got a raise… I thought about telling that to my boss LOL Want me full time? Give me a raise!

Anyway... I am rambling now :( I am going to do some housework so I can get back to the computer and look at my beautiful pictures and scrap some precious memories. That will cheer me up!